Wednesday, June 24, 2009

advice from moms. to moms. on baby #2.

If you've been in the store on a wednesday or friday, you may have met Dana and may have noticed that she is growing the newest addition to HullaBaloo...a little baby boy...and is due in a couple weeks!

So in her honor and to all my other friends, family & customers who are busy growing baby #2 I am passing on to you some invaluable advise that moms have given me. I have used all these tips...I'm not too proud to take advice...and truly believe that they have helped eliminate any "adjustment issues" for big sister Mary.

* when I'm holding the baby, I try not use that as an excuse as to why I can't help Mary with something at that moment. An example - when she asks for a cup of juice, instead of saying "you have to wait I'm holding/feeding the baby now" I'll say "daddy would love to get you some juice" or "I'll do it in just 2 minutes". The hope is that she won't resent the baby for taking up my time but rather its just mom asking her to wait a minute...again.

* if Ruby is fussing & I'm in the middle of something else - which is almost always - I'll make a point to say something like "just a minute, I'm putting Mary's shoes on" or my favorite "I'll be right there Ruby, mommy is going potty". It just puts a little bug in Mary's ear that yes, I do things for you first & that the baby doesn't always come first. Make little things up if you have to just to let it be heard.

* I also give Mary warnings as much as possible with things like "Ruby is getting ready to eat, do you want me to get you a snack...cup of juice...before I feed her, because I won't be able to while I'm feeding her". Then if she asks for something while I'm busy with the baby, I can respond with "I asked if you needed anything and you said no, so now you need to wait until I'm done". This helps her learn to take responsibility for the decisions that she makes.

* I always, always, always let Mary hold/kiss/hug/snuggle Ruby whenever she feels the need. No matter who is holding her or what we're doing at that moment, even if it's grandma...sisters trump grandmas or aunts or any company!!! We've also set up rules for holding the baby. She must sit "criss-cross applesauce" because it helps support the baby up front. We've had serious conversations about the baby's wobbly head, that you must always hold their head. And about the soft spot, that you must never press on the top of their head. We also have her do most of the holding on our bed. The surface area is large and soft if she were to accidently drop the baby, she wouldn't be falling to the floor.

So girls thanks for all your advice! Mary has adjust wonderfully to being a big sister! I don't think that she could possibly love her one bit more than she always does!! And good luck to all you moms out there...as always its a learning curve...but of course well worth it!

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